


I’ll Give You the Sky and Tell the Stars About You

by writingtwentyfour



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: (only slightly begrudgingly) falling in love, American AU, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Infidelity, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Jealous Harry, Jealous Louis, Jealousy, Liam's a bit of an arse in this, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Minor Character Death, Strangers to Lovers, alternate universe - family reunion, but its before the story even starts and its an original character and its literally touched on once, but its not any of the boys or those related to them, dan in real life Au, i think thats it, just thought maybe I should add that, obviously that's not how he really is or anything and I love Liam, sorry - Freeform, there's, very slight, what else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:35:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28227012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingtwentyfour/pseuds/writingtwentyfour
Summary: Louis meets the, quite possible, potential love of his life in abookstoreof all places when he’s visiting home, only to have his heart crushed when he finds out that said man is in a new relationship with none other than one of his childhood best friends. Louis tries to stay away, he really does, but he’s never been good at denying himself what he wants, especially when what he wants is long legs and thick thighs, broad shoulders and brown curls. Greengreeneyes.[Or, a “Dan In Real Life” AU]
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne/Harry Styles, Lottie Tomlinson/Original Male Character(s), Niall Horan/Original Female Character(s), Past - Louis Tomlinson/Original Male Character(s), Zayn Malik/Liam Payne
Kudos: 30





	I’ll Give You the Sky and Tell the Stars About You

**Author's Note:**

> This is something I wrote a while ago and I just sort of forgot about it so I figured I'd post it anyway just because, so here it is, hope you like it if you decide to read :)
> 
> Also just a quick thing about one of the tags:
> 
> Emotional infidelity- characters have feelings for other people while they are in relationships, but I don’t necessarily count it as cheating because they don’t do anything, and they try not to act on it so I don't think it'd be very triggering or anything, but maybe it could be, so I wanted to say something just in case :)
> 
> Also I changed the Tomlinson/Deakin children’s ages a little so that it fits the story better, but not too much

Louis pulls into the driveway of his childhood New Hampshire home just past seven o’clock, sun having already set, and honking the horn to alert his presence to those inside before turning the key in the ignition and cutting off the engine.

He climbs out of the car, hears excited voices from inside, getting louder when the front door is opened as he pulls his bag out of the rear seat. He’s immediately engulfed in hug after hug when he turns around, everyone clamoring around him, giving him kisses to the cheek and talking about how he’s grown (he hasn’t).

Louis smiles tiredly, wrapping his arms around his mom and burying his face into her neck. “It’s so nice to have you home baby,” she whispers into his ear as she squeezes him tight, pulling back to get a good look at him.

“Nice to be home,” Louis admits softly, smiling as Jay gives him a once over before deciding he’s still her healthy baby boy and pulling him along to the house.

He’s ambushed again when he gets inside, everyone else who hadn't swarmed outside, swarming in. He gets engulfed by Niall first, his best mate ever since he was a kid, and they stay huddled together for a longer-than-needed moment, both making up for what they haven’t had in a while. That’s probably Louis’s fault mostly; he’s been distant for these last couple years. With good reason, but distant, nonetheless.

Niall pulls back finally and grins, pressing a sloppy kiss to Louis’s cheek and Louis pretends to be disgusted but really, he just missed his best mate. “Hey fucker,” Niall grins, and Louis grins back.

Niall’s wife, Ally, walks up next and Louis sweeps her into a hug, burying his face into his neck and grinning; she’s family just as much as Niall now and Louis has no problem admitting how much he’s missed her cheery attitude and loud, but charming personality. Then there’s the rest of his siblings: Lottie, the oldest after him (twenty-four) and the one he’s closest too, just because of the smallest age gap. There’s Phoebe and Daisy too, the first sets of twins, who are both fifteen and growing up fast, much to Louis’s dismay, and finally the youngest twins, which contain seven-year-olds Doris and Ernest, Ernie being his only brother.

He says “hello’s,” to each of them, grinning as he pulls them into hugs, and kisses their foreheads, making comments about how much they _really have grown_ and how _no, you’re not allowed to do that, be babies again_. They’re all ecstatic to see him and he can promise he missed them just as much. He hasn’t seen their faces in months, and he’s being reminded now of just why he tries to get home as much as possible, even if it still isn't all that often.

There’s Matthew next, Lottie’s husband, and Lottie’s twins (yes, another set of twins, because when they tell you it runs in the family, it _really_ runs in this family), one boy and one girl; Sophie and Sammy, Samuel when he’s in trouble (which happens quite a lot - he takes after Louis in that aspect). He hugs Dan hello too, briefly catching up with his stepfather that has raised him since before he could remember, really.

There’s a couple of his neighbors as well, the families that he grew up around, and he says hi to all of them as well. The last person Louis spots is Liam, Louis’s other childhood best friend. Both him and Niall grew up in the houses on either side of Louis’s house and they were all as close as people can get as children, always sticking up for each other and having each other’s backs.

Liam and Louis weren't as close as they used to be, they just kind of lost contact when Louis moved away to attend college, unlike Niall and Louis who stayed close no matter the distance, but Louis missed him all the same and is more than happy to see him again.

It’s like no time has passed at all when they hug, and it should maybe be awkward but it’s not in the slightest and Louis should have expected that. Liam’s always been a pretty kind person, and of course he wouldn’t let the fact that they hadn't talked in months affect them. Louis was grateful for that.

-

Louis finds out later, when all the hellos have been said and everyone’s saying goodnight (everybody’s staying at the Tomlinson-Deakin household for the weekend as the home is plenty spacious, even if said people only live a door over), that he is staying in the “special room” for the extent of the reunion because Liam is having someone over this weekend, and he needs his own room. And apparently, “special room” means he's stuck on a cot in the laundry room that’s right off the kitchen, but Louis doesn’t really mind, so he wishes his family a goodnight before he’s slipping away with a cuppa, falling asleep soon after the mug is empty, to the sound of the clothes thumping in the washing machine. It’s not the most glorious of accommodations, but Louis will live.

-

Louis wakes up the next morning to voices in the kitchen and he immediately feels stressed. He’s always been a kind of lonely person, and Louis doesn’t mind it for the most part, not really, was always fine with just having Niall and Liam around, maybe a few coworkers as the years went on, but it also means that Louis gets anxious when he’s around so many people. Being in a large family - which he loves more than life itself, don’t get him wrong - can become a problem with that specific trait of his.

He walks warily into the kitchen and lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding when he sees that it’s only Jay and Dan in there, starting breakfast, and he walks up to his mom, kissing her cheek and saying a quick “good morning,” to Dan. Louis’s always been close with his mom so of course she notices immediately that he’s anxious, and she smiles softly at him, handing him a cup of tea.

“Why don’t you go get the papers after breakfast love?” she asks as she sets a bowl of his favorite cereal - Cocoa Puffs - in front of him, handing him a spoon and pouring milk into the glassware.

“I’m fine mom, I promise,” he reassures her as he stuffs his mouth with the cereal, reading the box.

Jay just smiles at him, chides softly, “It wasn’t a request, love. You need a break before you get too overwhelmed, and the rest of the day is just going to increase the chances of it, sweetheart. Just disappear for a couple hours and you’ll feel better, yeah?”

She’s giving him that look while she speaks, her mom look, the one that says _you-know-I’m-right-and-I’m-only-saying-this-for-your-own-good_ , so Louis decides to drop it, thanking his mother sincerely and nodding. He shovels another bite into his mouth, sneaking away before anyone else wakes up and goes in search of a breakfast Jay is sure to make when prompted.

-

Louis pulls into the parking lot next to a shop that reads: _BOOK AND TACKLE SHOP_ on the front and parks, taking the key out of the ignition and climbing out. He walks to the pier first, looking over the clear waterfront that flows around the docks, taking a deep breath, like the water can calm him (and maybe it can), before walking into the aforementioned shop, the bell dinging and the sole worker at the cash register looking up and welcoming him with an acknowledging nod.

Louis nods back, happy to not have to socialize, and he walks though the isles, scanning the books as he tries to find one to read. He’s just about to enter another row of books when the door dings again and he hears a deep voice coming from the front of the shop. Louis looks up curiously, only to widen his eyes at the sight of the man standing by the counter, trying to get the attention of the clerk working there.

He’s gorgeous, Louis notices first, but only because it’d be next to impossible not to. He has chocolate curls and a strong jaw, soft skin and pink lips to match. He’s tall, definitely taller than Louis and probably around six feet, give or take, if Louis had to guess. He has broad shoulders and he's all long legs and thick thighs and Louis thinks he’s the most attractive man he’s ever seen.

He watches as the mystery man tries to ask the clerk a question before huffing adorably and looking around, meeting eyes with Louis. Louis gasps at being caught staring and jumps back, busying himself in looking back at his previous book and ignoring the blush that has found its way to his cheeks.

He hears rather than sees the mystery man shuffle over, and the man walks up to him shyly, smiling and… _dimples_.

“Hi, excuse me,” he starts in a deep, slow thought-out drawl that Louis instantly falls for, “could you help me find a book possibly?”

_Curly_ , because that’s what Louis’s brain has decided to call him within the last three seconds, apparently, is smiling so sweetly at him, and Louis tries to keep himself from flushing anymore, just from the pure thought that this man is actually _talking_ with him, ignoring the fact that the stranger might be under the impression that Louis works here. “Yeah sure,” Louis squeaks, doing nothing for the heat he feels on his cheeks, and moving around the stacks to get closer to the man. “What are you looking for?”

Curly furrows his eyebrows cutely and Louis has to try his hardest not to fond too hard, because _really_ , it should be illegal to be… what? Twenty-five? give or take, and still look adorable with confusion written all over your face. It should, and yet, here Louis is, in front of the one man who makes is possible. “Er, well, that’s the thing, I don’t… know? Something distracting probably. And funny. Um, deep too, maybe. Uncomplicated? I guess?... I don’t know.”

Curly huffs, eyebrows furrowed as he looks at Louis like he’s begging for him to understand, and he speaks so slowly, like he thinks before every word he says, and Louis smiles at the thought. He isn't making much sense, probably just described half of the selection this bookstore offers honestly, but Louis doesn’t mind.

He nods, thinking already about what to grab in a bookstore he hasn’t been in before and he scans several shelves, grabbing as he goes. He lays them all down on a cart when he’s done and shows them to the stranger, explaining all the options. There’s poetry: Dickenson, and the Life of Gandhi because he’s “cool” as Louis had explained when Curly raised an amused smile. There’s a book about light houses that Louis had grabbed too, just because, and he showed that before picking up _A Good Man’s Hard to Find._

Curly seemed to agree with that, nodding earnestly and laughing at the title, and it was the most beautiful sound Louis had ever heard. Second was the stranger’s voice. Louis goes on, explaining each cover until he comes across the last one and picks it up. “If you want funny, this is the way to go,” he jokes, gesturing at the book that’s labelled _Everyone Poops._

The stranger doesn’t laugh right away, and Louis thinks maybe he just ruined any and all chances he had with the man, but then Curly is laughing, bright and unashamed and Louis wants to maybe make him do that forever.

Which.

That’s a startling thought.

The clerk comes up to them before Louis can continue and asks if he can help and Curly immediately starts to gather all the books Louis grabbed into his long arms. “I want all of them,” the beautiful stranger exclaims when asked, commenting that Louis should be paid extra for being so helpful, and Louis flushes beside the man.

The clerk seems confused, looking between the two of them and saying, “He doesn’t work here.”

Curly looks between Louis and the clerk and furrows his eyebrows, like he just can’t believe. “Well he should.” He says it like he's actually disturbed at the idea that Louis doesn’t work here given how talented he is at helping a stranger find a book, and Louis thinks it’s adorable.

The clerk just hums noncommittally in response, taking the books from Curly’s hands and saying he’ll ring him up. The stranger turns to Louis when the worker leaves and grins. “You’re smooth,” he says, dimples on display.

Louis flushes more and adverts his eyes, willing himself to stop blushing so much. “I’m not,” Louis disagrees earnestly, then adds, “I’m… Louis.” And it’s _so not_ smooth how he just said that but Curly smiles brightly, anyway, grinning and reaching a hand out to shake Louis’s. “Harry,” Curly, or well, _Harry_ , introduces himself.

_Harry_ , what a pretty name for a pretty person, Louis thinks. Louis pulls his hand back politely, decidedly _not_ focusing on the way Harry’s engulfs his, and says flirtatiously, “Can I make it up to you?”

-

Louis sets the muffin and two cups of tea down on the table, smiling at Harry as he sits down. He pulls the muffin out of the wrapper, looking at it quizzically. “I ordered a muffin… but I _think_ they gave me a small planet instead,” he jokes at the muffin that has a lopsided top, too tall to be considered normal and that looks quite deformed. Harry laughs, sweet and amused, and Louis thinks he might do that for everyone, but he still grins like he's accomplished something.

Harry picks up his tea, taking a slow sip and licking his lips when he sets the cup down. Louis smiles at him, taking his own sip of tea before splitting the muffin, setting one half on a napkin for Harry and taking the other for himself. Harry smiles at him in thanks and picks it up, taking a bite of the top and Louis swears he hears him moan. Harry grins when he sets it down, chewing, and says declaratively, “I still think it’s delicious.”

Louis shakes his head, picking up his muffin and taking a bite, smiling. “You would Curly, you would.”

-

They talk for _hours_ , and they talk about random things. Things like Louis’s _Where’s Waldo_ lunchbox from when he was a kid; the time he accidentally injured a girl in his class when he was in seventh grade because he was _convinced_ he was magic, but it turned out he _can't_ in fact make things float, and she got a broken arm for her troubles. They talk about where they grew up: here for Louis and a small town on the edge of New York for Harry, who has since moved to New York City.

They talk about their ambitions and hopes, making jokes the whole time to keep the conversation light. They talk about their families (Harry has a sister named Gemma, a mom named Anne, and a stepfather named Robin), and they talk about their jobs. They get up at _least_ six separate times for refills on their tea and they try out three other muffins, all that looked delicious but were nothing compared to the small planet they ate earlier, and Louis feels inexplicably light. Everything’s so easy with this stranger that he only knows the basics about, but Louis can't explain why.

He can't explain why he smiles just because Harry is laughing, can't explain how he gets butterflies when Harry’s eyes flicker to his lips. He can't explain what he’s feeling because he hasn’t felt it in years.

It’s just so easy, and they can go from hilarious to serious in a matter of seconds. That’s how they get to the topic of Miles.

And it amazes Louis because he doesn’t _like_ to talk about it with many people, not even some of his siblings, his _family_ members, but he’s doing it with Harry after _three hours_. So Louis talks about who Miles was, just how big of an impact he made on Louis's life, the weight of what even his _presence_ meant for him, and what happened to force him to leave Louis behind.

How he became Louis’s best mate pretty much as soon as he entered college, how he also became the first love of Louis’s life in the months that followed. How they were going to get married, settle down and start a family. How excited they were for the chapter that comes after college, the journey they'd been hearing about since they were kids: _Grow up. Fall in love. Settle down. Grow old. Be **happy.**_

He talks about how Miles found a mole on his leg one day that just wasn’t going away, too, how his world stopped when the doctors told him that Miles had Osteosarcoma, a common type of bone cancer that usually starts in the arms or the legs. How hard Miles fought, never gave up and had the most A+ attitude, even while he was becoming frail and sickly before he could even graduate from college. How one day it just progressed and suddenly there wasn’t anything else that could be done.

How he watched his future husband slowly weaken on a hospital bed, and how he was sitting in the hospital room when the monitor flatlined.

He talks about after, how Louis shut everyone out and just kinda went numb. Harry listens intently the whole time, smiling softly every time Louis mentions a little quirk of Miles or how strong he was. He doesn’t mention or even seem remotely _bothered_ by the fact that Louis is giving him an in-depth summary of his ex on their date (?), and the expression on his face isn't pity, its admiration and that’s… that’s. That's _different_.

It’s a response that Louis has never gotten to the story, but it’s the one he’s always wanted, at least subconsciously. He doesn’t want people to feel bad for him, he just wants them to understand. Because he loved Miles, but he’s gone and Louis is, he's _okay_ with that, he’s learned to cope with it and recently, in the last year or so, he’s been doing a pretty bang up job of it.

Harry just stares at him after he’s finished his explanation, doesn’t say anything. Until, “So you just flirt with unsuspecting men at bookstores instead, now?” And he’s grinning, positively grinning and just like that the mood is light again and Louis is thankful. Thankful that Harry is such a charmer and knows exactly what to say, how utterly perfect he is, really.

They’re in the middle of their seventh tea when Harry’s phone rings and he gives Louis an apologetic smile before he answers it, pressing it to his ear. Louis can only here snippets of the conversation, and only from Harry’s side, but he can hear the muffled voice of a man through the receiver.

Harry gives a quick, “Yeah, I’m right around the corner, I’ll be right there,” and then hangs up, starting to stand up from the chair and giving Louis another one of those apologetic looks. Louis’s eyebrows furrow and he catches himself before he lets his face fall; this had to end sometime, his brain unhelpfully points out. “I’m really sorry,” Harry says as he grabs his stuff, shaking his head like he’s disappointed in himself, “I completely lost track of time.”

Louis nods, slightly confused - disoriented maybe with the way his head is spinning - standing up and grabbing the box of Harry’s books, “’S fine, here, lemme,” and he follows Harry out to the parking lot, walking with him to his car.

Harry’s already buckled into the drivers seat when Louis gets the half-sense to ask, “Can I get your number?” His mom always taught him to be straightforward, so.

Harry looks up at him apologetically through the open door of the car, “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

Louis’s smile falters. Oh. “Is it because you’re in a relationship?”

And he's joking, Louis's _joking,_ except, “Yes,” is the response. _Oh_. “A new one,” Harry explains, taking the bags from Louis’s hand gratefully. “I’m sorry.”

Louis smiles back, but it’s probably more of a grimace. “It’s okay, I just. I don't wanna regret not asking, don't wanna just be two people finishing a conversation ya know?”

Harry smiles wistfully. “There’s no harm in that,” he says, like he's just accepted that so easily, but he grabs around in his car for a slip of paper anyway, scribbles ten digits on it. “Here,” he says, handing it to Louis with a flirty (?) smile. “Call me,” he says with a smile, and Louis is getting so many mixed signals it’s hurting his brain. Harry closes the door after that and starts the ignition, and Louis just watches as he goes, holding the paper in his hand with a smile that probably shouldn't make him feel so light.

-

When Louis walks back into his childhood home it’s already midafternoon and everyone’s up and about. He gets a couple weird looks from Niall but Louis just shrugs, smiling so that Niall doesn’t think there’s something seriously wrong. There’s not, Louis’s just a little confused, is all. Liam walks up to him next when he catches him in the foyer, raising an eyebrow. “What’s up with you?”

Louis just shakes his head, smiling to himself and laughing. “I… I met someone,” he says, and he tells Liam in a tone that conveys how shocked he is, how he never really thought he’d be able to say that again, pessimistic as it sounds, and the man grins.

“You _met_ someone?” he asks, incredulous and just a tad bit too loud probably.

Louis cringes, shushes him. “ _Hey, keep your voice down_ ,” he whisper shouts, “But yeah, yeah I think I did.” The smile on his face feels too good to be true, probably, but Louis lets his eyes crinkle anyway, and watches how Liam’s does the same.

“Get in, Tommo! Did you get his number then?”

Louis nods, probably too proud of himself for getting a _number,_ for fuck's sake. “Yep.”

Liam’s eyes light up, eyes flashing something like pride, and he screams “LOUIS MET SOMEONE!” before Louis even knows what’s happening.

Louis’s eyes widen and he lunges at him, tries to cover his mouth because no, he doesn’t want this announced to everyone. It's too late though, everyone’s already crowding into the entry room, asking what’s going on. There’s choruses of ‘ _Louis met someone’_ and ‘ _Louis met a hottie’_ going around as everyone - aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, family friends - clamors him with questions, asking ludicrous questions like when he’s going to call and when they can meet him. _It’s too soon_ , Louis thinks to all of it.

Liam smiles, clapping him on the back and exclaiming. “Hey, let me ask Henry,” before he disappears and Niall is surrounding him, asking him all sorts of questions.

Louis looks up when Liam walks back into the room, his best mate saying, “Louis needs advice, he met someone - _a hottie_ \- and he needs to know if it’s too soon to _call_ ,” as he squeezes the man’s shoulders and Louis smiles, ready to shake whoever’s hand Liam has brought home this year.

He stops when his eyes meet the person’s face and he freezes, completely dumbstruck, because _shit_. It’s _Harry_ standing in front of him. Harry from the bookstore who Louis poured his heart out to, Harry who Louis thought was going to be special, Harry who’s apparently actually _Henry_ and just as gorgeous now as he was an hour ago, just slightly more taken.

Louis stares dumbly, pulling his hand back from a handshake he’s already had today and opening his mouth to stop looking like such an idiot in front of everybody. He can see Liam giving him a look out of the corner of his eye, one that clearly emphasizes _what-are-you-doing??_ and the man probably thinks Louis has a _problem_ with Harry. Ha, if only that could be it.

Louis is about to say something, _anything_ , to Harry, but Jay speaks up before he can get a word out, telling the girls to go to the deck and the guys to sit in the living room so that they can do a crossword competition, and everyone whoops, dispersing into their separate rooms to start.

Liam disappears as well when Niall pulls him along, and Harry and Louis stay stuck to their spots as everyone walks away. Louis swallows thickly, trying to piece everything together and get his _stupid-fucking-mind_ to work. “Henry?” he asks, voice only cracking a bit, which Louis counts as an accomplishment.

Harry slash Henry at least has the decency to looks bashful, fumbling for words. “I-it’s Harry, I go by Harry, I _prefer_ Harry. Li just, he likes to call me by Henry.”

_Li_.

Louis nods, lips parted.

It’s just his luck that this would happen to him and he feels like such an idiot. He’s completely embarrassed to be standing here, everyone just having shouted that Louis possibly finally has someone special maybe, and here that someone is, standing in front of him, in a relationship with one of his best friends and his childhood neighbor. It’s fucking humiliating, is what it is, that Louis thought it was maybe something different, except he read everything since he entered that bookstore wrong and now the man that he’d been unashamedly flirting with all morning knows just how pathetic he is.

Louis kind of just wants to cry and he can feel the heat on his cheeks, is more anxious now than he was when he left. He doesn’t move for a couple heartbeats, and Jay comes back a minute later, when Harry and Louis are just staring at each other, and she softly grabs Harry's arm, claiming that they’re making an exception and Harry is going to be in the girls’ group while they play.

Jay pulls Harry with her, and he only looks back once as he stumbles away, giving Louis this _look._ A look that looks a whole lot like _pity_ , before he turns back around, and Louis’s eyes sting when he realizes. He stands there for another moment after they’re gone, staring off into space and thinking he’s so utterly fucked and a _massive_ idiot.

-

It turns out not only is Harry a complete charmer and basically everything Louis finds attractive in a person, he’s also very talented at crosswords, and Louis can hear the excited cheers coming from the patio, everyone congratulating him when he figures out _7 down,_ something the guys' group had been working on for the past ten minutes.

Louis is absolutely useless in the living room, completely distracted as Liam, Niall, Dan, Matthew, and the other males scream at him to get his head in the game. It doesn’t help when Niall and Liam start commenting about the Boy from the Bookstore, either.

Niall looks over to him from where he’s stood by his shoulder and says conversationally, offhandedly, “He must be special if you’re interested in him, Lou.”

Louis grimaces up at Niall, diverting his eyes again. “That’s what I’m trying to say guys, it’s not going to happen. He has a boyfriend,” Louis explains, suddenly very interested in the comic strip on the bottom of the crossword paper.

Liam, oblivious, is having none of that. “Well that’s not your problem is it Tommo? Just go for it lad.”

Louis thinks that’s slightly ironic. “It kind of is mate.” It really, _really,_ kind of is _._

-

The girls and Harry win by a landslide, unsurprisingly, and the guys get the prize of having to wash the dishes after. Niall takes the piss as they’re walking into the kitchen, saying that he wasn’t any help and Louis just smiles back, giving a short, stilted laugh. Niall means well, Louis knows, he just doesn’t understand what’s going on in Louis’s head right now, is all, and Louis can’t possibly hold that against him.

Louis’s quiet while he cleans and dries the dishes, listening as Liam walks into the kitchen and gives Jay a kiss on the cheek (she was always like a second mother to him). He grabs a mug from the sink and starts helping, looking over to Dan and Jay as he does. “What do you guys think of him?”

He sounds so hopeful and Louis really doesn’t want to listen to this conversation, doesn’t want to have to think about pretty green eyes and long eyelashes and perfect cheekbones and strong jawlines any more than he has too.

Dan gives an indifferent, “It’s too soon to tell Li,” because while he doesn’t really understand why his opinion matters to Liam, he still cares about him like a son and is happy to indulge him slightly.

Jay cuts in, always a gossip, setting down one plate and picking up another. “He’s lovely, Li, and if you fuck this one up, we’ll keep him and get rid of you.” She kisses Liam on the cheek to soften the blow and gives him a playful smile and Liam grins back.

“What about you mate?” Liam asks as he comes to stand next Louis at the sink, helping put away the dishes Louis has already dried.

Louis gives him a side glance before looking back down at the dish drainer. “I think he’s great,” he settles with, with no utter emotion in his voice, because yeah, he thinks he’s fucking amazing, but he doesn’t think it’d be a good idea to tell Liam that.

-

Louis gets pulled into a game of hide and seek a couple hours later, and he walks through the upstairs hallway as his siblings and nieces and nephews rush around him. Of course, the one person he runs into when they’re supposed to be hiding is Harry, and Louis gives him a small smile, searching for words just so he can keep the man’s attention. He’s pathetic, completely, but he doesn’t give two shits.

He offers to show the curly-headed man where they are on the map that hangs on the closet door in the hallway because it’s the best he can come up with, and Harry indulges him. Louis thinks he sees the same look in his eyes in that moment as the one he saw at the bookstore in what seems like lifetimes ago. 

When he’s sure there’s no one else around to hear them, everyone tucked away in rooms and under beds and behind curtains, he says, “If I knew, I _never would’ve_ Harry. I just - I wouldn’t have.”

Harry nods beside him, eyes trained on the map like Louis, but all of his focus is on the man next to him. “I know, love.”

_Love_.

“And for the record, I never called you hottie.”

Harry raises a playful eyebrow at him. “You don’t think I’m hot?”

He’s smirking and Louis blushes before he can even try to contain it, eyelashes fluttering closed while he looks down, a small smile on his lips as his cheeks heat up. Who even is this boy next to him? “That’s not--”

He’s interrupted before he can finish that, yes, he does find Harry hot; very, very attractive, in fact. It’s Liam, of course, and he beams at the two of them. “I’m glad you guys are getting to know each other,” he says happily, and Louis mumbles out his assent, but he can't even meet Liam’s eyes. He’s a shitty best friend.

Liam smiles and he leans in like he’s telling a secret, stage whispers, “I know what’s going on here.”

Louis’s breath hitches and he hears Harry’s do the same beside him. Before he can open his mouth to say anything, defend himself or Harry, Liam continues playfully, “ _You’re not hiding_.”

Realization spreads across both Louis’s and Harry’s faces and they both say a similar variation of, “Oh. Right,” scrambling to the closest room while Liam hides his head in his arm, counting out loud for them to hear.

They hide on the side of a bed opposite the door and slide down so they’re heads aren’t visible. It’s a sorry attempt at participating in the game, but they have bigger priorities than that anyway. As soon as they’re sitting there quietly, Louis tries to talk Liam up. It’s probably the guilt that makes him do it, but it can't hurt to make Liam look like a good guy to the person he’s dating. The beautiful curly-headed man that Louis kind of never wants to let go of. Yeah.

“He’s a great guy,” is what Louis goes with, offhandedly and very randomly, no doubt, but Harry just nods in agreement.

“He is, yeah… He’s really fun, you know? And he’s funny too; uncomplicated - just what I need.” Harry sounds like he’s trying to convince himself more than Louis, but Louis is kind enough not to call him out on it.

  
So Louis just hums, because _how is he supposed to respond to that?_ Harry doesn’t seem to think it’s enough though because he continues, explaining unnecessarily, “I just got out of a long, messy relationship and I met him at the gym and it’s just. It’s good for me. It’s supposed to be good for me. _He’s_ good for me.”

Louis nods dumbly. He doesn’t know how else to respond and he really doesn’t want to think about all the ways Liam gets to have Harry that Louis doesn’t. Doesn’t want to think about how they spend their nights or every interaction they’ve had before he met Harry, before he knew he existed. He doesn’t want to think about it, but he is. “He’s a great guy,” Louis repeats flatly, detached.

“You keep saying that,” Harry calls him out, and there’s an edge to his voice that Louis doesn’t quite understand.

“Because it’s true. You’re lucky to have him.”

It’s a lie, it’s such a lie. Louis knows just how Liam’s relationship’s go. He knows how he brings them home, claims to be in love with them and that they’re different, _they are_ , and then a few months later there’s another. Louis wouldn’t say his best mate is a whore, because he’s _not,_ not in the least, but Liam likes his freedom; he likes to explore his sexuality because he couldn’t, not really, not when they were in high school, and Louis understands that. He probably would’ve been the same way in university except for the fact that he met his someone day one, full stop. So he understands and he loves Liam and he doesn’t have a problem with it, except that Harry is different. Harry’s different from every other man Liam’s brought home and Louis doesn’t know what to think about that.

It doesn’t matter anyway, because he doesn’t get any more time to think about it. Liam’s bumbling into the room and exclaiming that he found them a second later and that’s that.

-

Ernie and Doris wanted to go to the beach which meant that _everybody had to go_ _to the beach_ and soon enough they were all making their way down the shore, running around and screaming and jumping about while the waves lapped against the coast and the wind blew over the water and up the shoreline.

Louis stays towards the back as all of his siblings follow after Harry, asking him questions and jumping around with him, letting him swing the younger ones around in his arms. Dan stays back with him, asking about work and New Jersey and how he’s doing, and Louis does his best to answer, tries not to let the conversation sound stunted and short but he can't help it. He doesn’t want to talk, and he thinks Dan knows that, thinks that’s why he stayed back with him. Louis knows it’s blatantly obvious that something’s wrong, but he just figured his family would be kind enough to not comment on it. Apparently not.

Daisy runs up while Louis’s in the middle of telling Dan how he might be getting a call in a couple days about an interview for a column in a big sports magazine, smiling and exclaiming, “He’s _amazing!_ Did you know Harry’s been to Spain, Barcelona, _and_ Greece?!” Louis did, but he doesn’t say that.

She sprints away right after, catching back up to where Harry is holding Sammy on his shoulders and Sophie clinging to his leg, asking him another question as they walk, from what Louis can tell at least. Dan turns to him once his sister is gone and unceremoniously asks, “Any potential relationships Lou?”

Louis levels Dan with a look. “No. Just let it go please,” he huffs.

Dan nods, holding his hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay. It’s just that it’s been years Lou.”

His stepfather - who Louis considers his real father - walks away after that, before Louis can respond, and Louis kicks at the sand underneath him, hears the giggles and screams from the front of the line and can pick out Harry’s laugh easily. “Yeah, I know,” he mutters under his breath to absolutely no one.

-

Dinner is just more _Get to Know Harry_ time, and while Louis doesn’t necessarily _mind_ , he’s going crazy. He’s sitting here, listening to information he already knows while his sisters spew out questions like ‘ _Do you have any siblings?’_ And ‘ _What’s your sign? Oh, Aquarius? No way, me too!’._ And like, it’s not that he’s jealous that everyone else has Harry’s attention, but he’s so fucking jealous and he hates it. He wants Harry to look at _him_ , talk to _him_ , want _him_. Doesn’t care about what Lottie and Daisy and Phoebe and Jay and Ally keep asking about.

“Tell us a secret that not even Liam knows,” is the next question and it comes from Lottie, because of course, in an excited and probably over-involved whisper. She’s always been nosy, why would that stop now? (Louis refuses to admit that it’s because he taught her to be like that.)

Harry looks bashful as he looks around the table, searching for something to say. His eyes lock with Louis’s just for a second, and Louis adverts his own just so he doesn’t say something utterly stupid out loud, something like _‘I already know all his secrets’._

Harry looks back to Lottie and stutters for a moment before he decides on, “I’m a great pancake maker? And I like to cook too.” Everyone at the table erupts into cooing and swooning at all that is Harry Edward Styles, and Jay says something about him having to help cook breakfast one morning if he wants, to which Harry smiles happily at and nods emphatically because he’s a charmer like that.

“What would a perfect day look like?” is the next question, from Phoebe this time, and before Harry can even respond, Liam chimes in first, as if he was the one asked, even though Louis can determine decidedly that he was in fact _not_. “My perfect day would start with Henry and end with Henry.”

Jay shushes him playfully, says, “Hush love, we weren't asking you,” and Liam laughs good-naturedly. He leans over towards Harry and Louis knows what’s going to happen before it does, but he can't force himself to look away anyway. He’s a masochist, what can he say.

Liam’s lips meet Harry’s and the whole table (save for Louis, who wants to throw up) coos.

Like.

_Actually coos_.

It’s short and chaste and it looks almost stunted, at least on Harry’s part, which. Interesting. Harry pulls back as quick as it’s over, his cheeks flushed red, and the first person he looks at is Louis. Louis can’t hide how his face falls at it, as if he has any _right_ , and he knows Harry catches it if the way his does too is any indication.

All the attention, however, is quickly back on Harry, putting him on the spot as ten or so pairs of eyes stare at him. “I think… I think it would be somewhere in a country with a language I don’t know,” he starts, in his slow, deep voice that Louis knows has completely charmed the rest of his family just like it charmed him. “Somewhere I’m completely out of my element.”

Matthew speaks up from where he’s sat by Lottie. “Think you’re already there, mate.”

A chorus of laughter fills the air around the table again and Lottie smacks her husband playfully while Harry shakes his head politely, disagreeing earnestly with a blush on his face. Liam speaks up once the noise has died down, wrapping an arm around Harry and smiling what can only be described as fondly towards him, opening his mouth to say something that’s going to be most certainly, most probably, sappy. His eyes twinkle. “I would just like to say,” Liam starts, _croons_ , like he’s a bloody _romantic_ all of the sudden, “that I remember the first time I saw Henry, I thought I must’ve died, because suddenly there was this angel on the earth.”

Everyone coos over the couple and Harry flushes, smiling at his plate and Louis can't take this anymore. The next question is even worse, _marginally_ worse, Daisy asking, “Are you guys in love?” like it has the simplest answer, and Louis does _not_ want to hear the answer to that, doesn’t know if he could, so instead of letting Harry get any further than parting his lips, he stuffs a fork full of corn into his mouth and mumbles conversationally, “Does anyone else like ketchup with corn?”

Everyone just kind of looks at him like he’s crazy, and admittedly, he might be, but Louis huffs, standing up from his chair and walking into the kitchen where all the smaller kids are eating. He opens up the freezer and stuffs his head inside, not really looking for anything but doing anything to get his mind off, “ _are you guys in love_ ,” and how Harry was opening his mouth to answer in a matter of seconds, like he was so sure of the answer.

He pulls back and shuts the door, walking to the island and opening all the drawers, slamming them around probably unnecessarily as he looks for a knife and muttering nothing important under his breath. When he looks up, all of his nieces and nephews and the youngest twins are staring at him in shock, so he just grabs the closest knife to his hand and stabs it into the pie that sits on the counter in front of him, picking it up and walking back to the dining room.

  
As he sits down Daisy is gearing up to ask another question, and she adds thoughtfully, “When does a boyfriend become a lover?” right as Louis is taking a sip of his tea. He only narrowing misses choking on it.

“Can we stop with the questions?” he speaks up sharply when he’s wiped the tea off his face, and he knows the annoyance in his tone is painfully obvious. “You’ve been grilling him all bloody night.”

Jay turns to Harry from across the table with an apologetic look, eyebrows furrowed. “I’m sorry love, does it feel like we’re grilling you?” She speaks sweetly and calmly as she asks, contrary to Louis’s tone just now, and Harry is quick to shake his head ‘no’. “No, no, absolutely not. I love it,” he implores, as if Jay’s questions actually needed an answer, as if Harry would actually be rude enough to say the opposite here, in front of everyone.

Louis scoffs as he takes a bite of the pumpkin pie before looking back up at Harry, eyes hard as he stares into the man’s olive-green irises. “I’m sorry for them, none of Liam’s other boyfriends have ever been subjected to such in-depth questioning.”

Niall laughs from where he sits on Liam’s other side and nudges him, says, “Yeah, Louis does have a point,” but he’s the only one. Louis registers how Liam looks embarrassed out of the corner of his eye, the way his cheeks have heated up and his lips are pressed together in a tight line, but Louis continues anyway, recklessly. _Gosh, why can’t he just shut up?_

“I’m right though, aren’t I? Not that guy you picked up at the pub the first night here last year, not the Knick’s player who disappeared after a week, or the twink from the second year of uni? None of the flight attendants from every major and regional airline who’ve wheeled their _carts_ through this house.” He chuckles darkly at the thought, every man who’s entered this home and had their hearts played with by one of his best mates, putting emphasis on the metaphorical _carts_ that Louis knows at the least the adults picked up on.

When he stops to take a breath, he can see everybody’s mouths hanging open in shock, just staring at him and waiting for him to go on. “Okay that’s enough,” comes Dan’s voice from next to him.

Louis isn’t stopping now though. He’s in too deep and Harry looks like he’s challenging him from across the table, daring him to continue; he looks almost interested to hear what else Louis has to say about it, and even though it’s not positive attention he’s getting from the man, it’s attention all the same, and Louis wants desperately to keep it. He’s so fucking pathetic and if he had the time to think about it, his eyes would surely burn with everybody’s – _Harry’s_ \- awareness of how pitiful he is. “What? Am I _wrong_? Come _on_.”

It’s dead quiet and no one’s laughing except Louis, who’s really just doing it because he’s uncomfortable. Liam sets his fork down, leaning back in his chair, smiling tightly. Louis’s sure the action takes a lot of work and much more dignity than Louis can say he holds right now. “Wow, Louis. Thank you for pointing that out.” The tone is clipped, if not bitter, and Liam turns to Harry next, says, “He’s right, it’s Henry’s turn to ask me whatever he wants.”

“He _prefers_ Harry,” Louis mutters, voice dark.

Liam hears him, obviously, and takes a deep breath. “Ask me then. _Harry_.”

“I don’t have any questions,” Harry shrugs and he looks embarrassed. If it’s for Liam or Louis, Louis doesn’t know.

“Oh, come _on_ ,” Louis chimes in because he really doesn’t know when to shut the hell up, and he laughs condescendingly. Harry shoots him a look from the other side of the table and his eyes darken.

“I really don’t have anything I want to know. Li said early on that if I’d forgive him for his past, he’d forgive me for mine.”

Louis squeezes his fork in his hands and swallow thickly. _That bastard_. “Well, that was stupid wasn’t it?” he mutters.

Jay abruptly stands up, says as cheerily as she can manage, voice strained, “Okay, everybody! Into the family room.”

Everyone is very quick to get up. Liam is first, throwing his napkin on the table and walking way, and Lottie, Matthew, and the twins follow after, the girls shooting Louis glares as they go. Harry is the last to leave save for Jay, and he gives Louis a disappointed look as he walks away that makes Louis’s heart sink. His eyes sting a little.

He starts to stand up too, but Jay sits him back down in the chair sternly with a hand on his shoulder and says, “Not you, you’re doing the dishes. _Alone_.”

Louis sighs, waiting until his mother has disappeared around the corner before sitting back in his chair and throwing his fork onto his plate roughly, wiping at his eyes. “ _Fuck_.”

-

Liam walks into the kitchen a couple minutes after he’s started doing what Louis guesses is his Mom’s punishment for humiliating Liam in front of everybody and probably embarrassing himself and Harry just as much, and Liam silently helps, picking up the plates that Louis is in the middle of drying and does the same. He doesn’t say anything, barely acknowledged Louis’s presence, and the silence is deafening in Louis’s ears. The quiet leaves room for all of Louis’s thoughts and those are _loud_.

“I’m sorry,” Louis says when they’ve been standing in silence for too long.

Liam just waves him off. “You’re my best mate Lou, you could never make me stay mad at you.”

Louis doubts that, but when he thinks about it, there’s a part of him that realizes this might be his only chance. It can't get much worse than how pissed everyone else is at him right now, he figures, so this is probably the best time to say, ‘ _hey, by the way I know this is the first relationship you’ve ever in your entire life seemed to care about, but I’m halfway to in love with your boyfriend and he might be too. possibly. if I’m lucky’._ Yeah, no.

It doesn’t matter anyway though, because Liam sets his plate down before he can figure out how to best deliver the words, asking, “Can I tell you something?”

Louis closes his mouth and sighs defeatedly. “Sure.”

“When you were talking about my other guys, I – I realized something, Lou. What I feel for Harry… it’s _different_. Like, I’ve just never felt like this with any of the guys before. Ever. It’s like, I don’t know, he makes my heart - ah, what’s the word?”

“Pound?” Louis supplies.

Liam’s eyes light up. “Yeah, yes! And…”

“It’s like your heart is actually outside your ribs?”

“Yeah, exactly!”

“Exposed, vulnerable…”

Liam nods happily, chuffed that Louis can put into words what he can’t. “Yeah it’s…”

Louis interrupts him again and Liam doesn’t even seem to care that he can’t get a word out. “Wonderful and awful? Heartsick and alive at the same time?”

Liam nods hurriedly. “Yes, yeah! What do we _call_ that?”

Louis laughs self-depreciatingly, setting the last dry dish on the stack. “Love,” he supplies simply, taking a deep breath because the other alternative is letting the tears fall and he hates being weak.

Liam snaps his fingers, grinning. “Yeah! That’s it!. . . you know, you always did have a way with words.” He says it in a tone that sounds like he’s admiring Louis, and the resounding grin he gives is blinding, conveys just how happy he is, an air of bliss Louis hasn’t felt from Liam in a long time. Louis does his best to smile back; it’s more of a grimace.

-

Louis goes in for his round of goodnight kisses and hugs upstairs a couple hours later, when all his siblings are climbing into bed. He stops when he sees Liam going through the bookcase, asking if anybody knows where the book he’s looking for is so he can give it to Harry to read. Louis is just about to ask which book when Liam pulls his hand back with an ‘ _Aha!_ ’, a familiar cover in his grip and Louis’s eyes widen.

He reaches out to grab it from Liam’s grip but Liam’s faster. “No, Liam. Stop. Please. You can’t give that to him,” Louis begs, reaching for the book another time and failing again. Fucking Liam’s long ass arms and slight height advantage. _Slight_. Louis is _not_ short.

Liam gives his best puppy eyes back, arm extended high enough so that Louis can't reach it and asks, “Why not?”

Louis huffs, giving up on trying to steal it and fixing Liam with his best _I-love-you-but-I-have-no-problem-killing-you_ look instead, cocking his hip. “Because I didn’t write it for everyone to read Li.”

Liam just gives him an unimpressed look. “Louis. You published it. That means you _literally_ wrote it for _everyone_ to read. _Pleaseeee?_ ”

Louis sighs exhaustedly. On the one hand, he knows it’s a bad idea to let Harry read that, knows it holds phrases that Harry shouldn’t know that Louis’s written, and it’ll almost definitely come back to bite Liam in the ass later on, but Louis also knows Liam will probably just come back and take the copy when Louis’s not looking anyway. He internally rolls his eyes. “Fine, whatever.”

Liam’s answering beam is blinding. “You don’t need to be embarrassed of your writing if that’s what this is about Lou, I promise Harry will love it.”

Louis just nods noncommittally and watches as Liam sneaks into the room next to the bookcase, the room Harry and him are staying in. Together. Something twists in Louis’s gut and Louis refuses to acknowledge it as jealousy. Maybe he’s coming down with a stomach bug.

All the bedroom doors close pretty much all at once after that, before Louis’s even gotten a chance to say goodnight, so he’s guessing everybody is still relatively upset about dinner. He stands there in the hallway alone, saying a “goodnight,” to no one in particular, and walks back downstairs by himself, falling asleep on his cot with the laundry thumping in the dryer.

-

He wakes up the next morning to everybody already outside, stretching in leggings and shorts and he slips an Adidas jacket over his shoulders, pouring a cuppa for himself before walking down the porch to them.

Liam yells for them to all line up and Louis is pulled into it without a choice, standing at the back and waiting to see what’s going on. Music starts playing from a speaker and suddenly Liam is dancing in the front, everyone else following after him and Louis gives his family a bewildered look before he tries his best to not look like a complete idiot and follow along. (He fails tremendously.)

Ten minutes into doing the initiation process of whatever cult his family has apparently joined, Liam looks back to Harry - who, of course, is following along perfectly and seamlessly - and tells him to take over. Harry is more than happy to oblige, and he dances his way to the front, rolling his hips and swaying as everyone follows along. Liam moves to the back and forces Louis closer, tells him to watch Harry and try a little harder. Louis knows he means well, but he’s _this_ close to smacking the guy.

He does watch Harry though. It isn't hard, seeing as the boy is wearing tights, fucking _tights_ , and Louis watches from behind him as Harry sways, pressing a hand to his V-line and rocking his hips from side to side. He’s all long legs and slim hips and wide shoulders and it’s all Louis can do to just watch. He looks gorgeous, if Louis’s gonna cut around the bullshit, and it kills Louis the way the man throws his head back as he pretty much grinds on air, lips parted like he’s in complete ecstasy. There’s a small, pleased smile on his lips, carefree and happy, and Louis is _going_ to kill him.

…If Harry isn't the death of him first.

There’s a very high possibility of that happening.

Louis has to excuse himself when he can't take watching Harry roll his hips like that anymore, can’t take imagining how… er, _useful_ that is in other circumstances, and Louis’s probably sporting a semi, but he doesn’t care to check before walking back into the house, ignoring when Niall yells at him to _come back Tommo_ and, _it’s okay, you’ll get better Lou_. As he walks into the house, he wills his raging hard-on to go away, because with as many lines as he’s already crossed, Louis refuses to get off to the picture of obscene lips and long legs and pert asses and sinful hips.

-

Louis tries to let it go, he really does, but it’s like Harry is doing it to him on purpose. He walks into Liam and him snogging on the couch - just, out in the open - or sees them in the yard after they go on a run, stretching each other out. And by _stretching each other_ out, Louis means Harry stood behind Liam with his hands on his boyfriend’s hips, pulling Liam’s back into his own crotch and then leaning forward on him and sliding down his body, half-way to dry humping right in the front yard. Ridiculous.

He hears someone call Harry’s name, tells him that there are towels in the hall closest and Louis climbs that stairs a few minutes later, slipping into the bathroom where he knows Harry is, if for nothing but his own gosh damn sanity over the course of the next couple days.

Harry’s there obviously, bent over the sink and _isn't that just perfect_. He’s washing his face though, so Louis doesn’t comment on it, instead says, “We need to talk.”

Harry continues to run the water over his face, not even startled by Louis’s presence. “Can’t it wait?”

Louis furrows his eyebrows. “ _No,_ it can't wait,” he huffs indignantly, “Why? Is this working for you? Because it’s sure as hell not for me.”

Harry shrugs while he’s putting more soap on his face, says, “I’m having fun.”

Louis rolls his eyes. Fun. He’s having _fun_. That’s just dandy. “That’s… okay - we need ground rules.”

Harry stands up, soap still over his eyes so he can’t see and asks, “What kind of rules?” He reaches out, probably looking for a towel, but Louis ducks anyway, dodging him and answers, “This is what I’m talking about. We can’t keep doing this.”

Louis hands Harry a towel and Harry smiles as he wipes his face clean, finally opens his eyes so that Louis can see the gold and green specks in them. Gosh, he’s beautiful. Breathtaking. “You’re the one who walked in here, love.”

Louis raises an accusing finger at Harry, “Yes! See, that’s what I’m talking about. You can't keep calling me that.”

Harry raises an amused eyebrow. “What? ‘ _Love’_? Why not? …Love _._ ” He’s smirking and it should _not_ look that attractive on him, Louis thinks.

“Because you just shouldn’t okay? And… and you need to stop dancing so _seductively_ , like salsa-ing in the front yard.”

Harry laughs unbothered, as Louis continues, undeterred. “If you could just not do that, as a rule, that would be lovely. Oh!- and stop reading my book! Just… don’t do that either, because. Because it’s too fucking attractive, quite frankly. And… and- there are other things you could not do, like exist.”

And Louis didn’t mean it, but it doesn’t even matter if he did or not because Harry only looks amused, completely unoffended. “Oh. Thank you.” He deadpans, but he's giggling.

Louis shakes his head, squeezing his eyes shut, “Hell, that’s not…actually… yeah! I didn’t mean it, but I said it, so. Just. And you know what else?”

Harry indulges him, barely holding back a snicker. “What’s that?”

“I’m gonna make myself less attractive, so I don’t encourage any inappropriate feelings,” Louis declares, nodding to himself like he’s stumbled across something.

That seems to be all Harry can take of Louis’s utter _craziness_ though, because he bursts out into a fit of giggles (yes giggles, because this man is a _child_ ). Louis nods, unamused, “Okay, that’s hilarious, _I’m_ hilarious. But I’m serious. And I’m gonna stop thinking about you too.”

“Good!” Harry encourages, grinning.

“I will,” Louis promises seriously, and he’s not sure who he’s trying to convince. “And if I _start_ thinking about you, which might possibly, probably happen in a moment of… of--”

“Weakness?” Harry supplies, smirking.

“…Weakness, yes- I’m going to focus all of my thoughts on your flaws.”

Harry raises an eyebrow, nodding seriously, indulgently. “My flaws?”

Louis nods. “Yes your flaws.”

“And they are?”

“I - I have no idea,” Louis admits stupidly. “--but you can rest assured that I am going to find them and--”

Louis doesn’t get to finish his monologue before the door is opening, ramming into Harry and the curly-headed man shoots to the door to stop whoever’s trying to enter, Louis jumping into the shower as quickly as possible, hiding behind the curtain.

It’s Phoebe, he can hear, and she offers to help Harry with getting his shower ready, saying how difficult the handles can be to figure out. Before Louis knows it there’s a manicured hand reaching into the tub - one that belongs to his sister - and then cold water is spraying down on his face, pouring over his clothes. He can hear Harry muffle a snicker from the other side of the shower curtain, the bastard.

Phoebe continues when she pulls her arm back, and Louis can hear the shuffle of her feet, knows she’s entering further into the bathroom. She’s going on about needing to ask Harry about something, for advice, and he knows Harry doesn’t really have a choice, but he still shakes his head when the curly-headed man agrees indulgently with a hum.

She starts explaining, talking about Harry’s travel and how amazing it is, all of it, and-- she cuts herself off. “You know, that looks like it’s ready,” she says, gesturing to the what Louis assumes is the shower with the steam rising out of the top.

“Right,” Harry nods, and Louis can see him starting to undress in the small hand mirror that hangs just outside the shower curtain, can see him pulling the shirt over his head and the wide expanse of his naked chest, his _tattoos_. Louis didn’t think he had a thing for tattoos, but _holy fuck, he might now._

Harry must have been undressing too cautiously because Phoebe makes a noise of understandment, turning around where she had sat on the toilet lid and apologizing, “Sorry, lemme just-- there, now you can get undressed,” she says once she’s turned away from Harry.

Harry makes a grateful noise and Louis can see him fully undressing now, pulling down his joggers and then gripping the waist of his boxers. Phoebe continues, talking about how inspiring everything that Harry said was and Harry hums, stepping into the warmth of the shower.

He’s butt naked, tries to cover what he can with his hands, but Louis can’t help the once over he gives him, how his eyes slip down his toned, lanky torso, down, down, down, and oh.

Shit, Harry’s _big_. Louis snaps his eyes back up.

He blocks out the rest of what Phoebe is saying, and Harry doesn’t seem to be paying her much attention right now either, too busy stifling his giggles at Louis standing there, clothes drenched and a wet rag that had fallen off the water head now lying across his face elegantly.

Louis rolls his eyes, reaching out to softly smack Harry across his wet chest to get him to shut up. He looks around the confined space when Harry finally controls himself, thinking of an escape route and cursing under his breath when he finds the window that leads out to the roof.

He sighs, opening it while Harry keeps humming in all the right places to Phoebe’s conversation, and without time to think, he climbs out, stepping onto the roof and feeling triumphant. Before his foot slips. He goes tumbling, sliding down the slanted panels of the roof and landing in a bush on the edge of the house.

-

Louis comes back out of his ‘room’, changed into dry clothes, to see Ernie and Dottie in the living room, climbing all over Harry’s back while Harry crawls on his hands and knees and pretends to be a dinosaur, sound effects and all.

He smiles at the picture for a couple moments, stays silent as he watches Harry laugh with them and he can't help the way his heart aches at it. He walks away before he can be caught staring and goes back into his room, sitting down on the cot with his head in his hands and sighing, thinking about how the hell he’s going to get himself out of this mess.

The door clicks open a couple minutes later, and Louis looks up to see Jay and Dan walking into the room, closing the door behind them. He furrows his eyebrows suspiciously while he watches them sit down on a stool. His mom looks sympathetic which Louis doesn’t understand, and Dan just looks like he doesn’t want to be there but is anyway, if not only to support his wife. That can't be good.

“What’s going on?” Louis asks hesitantly as he tracks their movements with his eyes.

“Honey,” Jay starts as she sits down in front of Louis, “You do so much for our family, love. But you never do anything for yourself. When was the last time you did something for _you_?”

Louis’s only more confused and he flicks his eyes to Dan to see if he can explain better, in English preferably, but Dan looks helpless.  
  


  
Louis huffs, “I don’t know what you guys are talking about, I’m fine.”

Jay gives him an unimpressed look, “Sweetie--”

She’s cut off by the door opening to the room again and Lottie and Matthew walk in, two baskets of laundry in their hands, and Jay tries to get them to wait, but Louis urges them in. Maybe if they’re not alone his parents will go easier on him.

Jay continues anyway, going on and on about Louis’s happiness and getting out more and yada-yada-yada, and the door keeps getting pushed open, more people with baskets shuffling into the room because apparently the whole family has decided to do their laundry _now_ , and soon enough it’s crowded in the small laundry room slash Louis’s bedroom. During all the madness, his mom proposes that he go out with someone and Louis hastily refuses, which only leads all his siblings, and Niall and Ally, to comment, telling him it’s a good idea, and Matthew telling him to - bluntly - _just get laid mate_.

Louis groans at that, Lottie smacking her husband on the chest, but the smirk on her face gives away the fact that she’s probably proud of him for being the one to say it, and he flops back in his bed, rubbing his hands over his face frustratedly just as Liam and Harry walk in at all the commotion. Great, now it’s a party. “Mom, I don’t need to go on a date. I’m fine, F-I-N-E.”

Jay gives him a look. “You’re not fine doll. You’ve been acting weird this whole weekend--” Louis internally rolls his eyes; yes, he has, but there’s supposed to be an unspoken agreement not to comment on it. Just let him get through the weekend and get away from all of this - from _Harry_ \- again. Harry who’s staring at him blatantly, even with everyone else standing around them, “Now, we ran into one of your classmates at the supermarket this morning - Zayn Malik, you remember him, don’t you? - and he kept asking about you--” Louis groans before his mom even finishes, knows with no uncertainty where this is going, “--and so we set up a date. And before you even say anything, you’re _going_ , Louis William, if it’s the last thing I make you do.”

Louis’s just shaking his head, has given up on responding anymore, and his eyes flick to Harry. Harry’s staring right back at him and Louis swears there’s this look in his eye, a look that, if Louis didn’t know better, looks a whole damn lot like jealously. Which.

Liam chimes in from where he’s standing in front of Harry before Louis can think about it too much, saying helpfully, “Didn’t we call Zayn “Pigface” in school because of his nose or something?”

Everyone groans, scolding Liam for making a comment like that but Niall speaks up, agreeing with Liam. “Oh, yeah, we actually did. I remember that. I think Nick’s the one who started it actually.” Everyone makes noise of affirmation and Louis’s eyes flicker to Harry again. He looks suspiciously less upset about this development and it makes Louis even more pissy.

  
Louis shakes his head, looking back at his mother and declares resolutely, “I am not going on a date with Zayn “Pigface” Malik.”

-

Louis is going on a date with Zayn “Pigface” Malik.

He was sat in the living room, all dressed up, and his family had given their all to supporting him, sitting in the room with him while he waited. Apparently “supporting him” meant Niall playing the piano while Liam sung lyrics that when something like:

_There's a boy coming over here  
He’s on his way right now  
He’s driving here to meet Loueh_

_  
What's his name?  
Zaynie! Pigface! Malik! _

_Mmmm, Zaynie!_

_  
He’s livin in a house of bricks!  
Not stone or sticks!_

_  
I'll be your big bad wolf!  
I love your cute curly tail!_

_  
This little piggy went to market  
Oh yea  
This little piggy stayed home  
This little piggy had roast beef  
This little piggy had none  
This little piggy went wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee  
All the way home  
say, Oink! _

_Zaynie! Pigface! Malik! Ooooh  
Zaynie! Pigface! Malik! Yeah!_

It was absolutely horrible, and they were completely off key. Louis hated Niall and Liam, he truly did.

Liam had also offered to make it a double date with him and Harry (so that Louis wouldn’t feel awkward. Yeah, trust him, Louis was laughing at his shitty luck too) and wow, what a fantastic idea. That changes _everything_ , Louis was _sure fucking excited_ now.

The end of the song was cut off by commotion at the front door, and people were shuffling back to let another person in. Before Louis knew it, someone else was stepping into the living room, smiling right at Louis and that… that… there was no fucking way.

Apparently, like everyone else Louis knew from high school, Zayn had done some growing up of his own in the last couple years, because _fuck_. The man definitely didn’t look like a pig in the least - his nose looked like it was carved by Greek gods to be honest - and _shit_ he was attractive. Fuck. Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad.

Louis walked up to him cool-ly, resolutely ignoring how Harry practically had steam coming out of his ears from where he was sat with Liam - dressed up too - and kissed him on the cheek in greeting, letting Zayn place a hand on the small of his back and lead him back down the porch after saying goodbye to his family. Louis didn’t even bother waiting for Harry and Liam, walking out of the house and smirking at Zayn as they climbed into his car.

(It also turned out that Zayn had a gorgeous red convertible, which they all drove in, to the bar. Louis was really fucking thankful right now.)

-

Relatively, it was going great. Zayn was a fun person to be around and always had a new topic for when there was a lull in conversation. He had a similar sense of humor to Louis, which was really just perfect, and Louis was actually having fun.

Zayn tells them about his job and how busy he always is, and Liam makes a comment from his side of the table in the pub they’re sitting in, says how hard it must be to balance relationships in Zayn’s life with his packed schedule.

Zayn smiles softly at Liam, playing with the straw of his drink. He tilts his head and looks off into the distance, like he’s thinking wistfully. He drops his chin again and Louis sees his eyes cloud over as he lifts the beverage to his mouth and takes a sip out of the straw “I was in a relationship actually, recently,” he starts vaguely, and Louis listens intently, listens to the way Zayn’s voice sounds rougher, filled with emotion. “A really serious one… but he died in a freak ac- _cident_ \- I’m sorry,” Zayn’s voice catches, and he shakes his head, trying to calm himself evidently. Louis’s heart immediately melts for the man sitting next to him, Liam sympathizing with him too, but Louis sees Harry roll his eyes out of the corner his eyes and like, _seriously? What the fuck is his problem?_

Zayn continues, clearing his throat and looking like he’s willing himself not to cry. “We didn’t know each other long, only three days, but you know how sometimes you just _know_?” His eyes are imploring and filled with emotion as he speaks, and Louis thinks the man probably could have made a good actor in another lifetime.

“ _Yes_ ,” Harry is the first to chime in and Louis looks at him, shocked - _three days? -_ and their eyes meet. Harry falters for a second when green meets blue before he hurriedly pulls his eyes away when Liam agrees as well, laying a hand on Harry’s thigh and smiling at him. Harry does his best to smile back but Louis knows it’s subpar at best - a grimace - and Louis can’t help to wonder just what that means.

-

The night wares on and Louis wants them to, he really wants them to, but him and Zayn just don’t click. The man’s gorgeous, a practical saint (he works as a plastic surgeon, specializes in operating on _burn victims_ and _children born with facial deformities,_ like, _c’mon_ ), and he's a hard worker too. He has similar interests to Louis, even praises Louis’s _writing_ , and he should be perfect, _is_ perfect, but Louis feels absolutely nothing; zilch, squat, nada, nothing, nix; the big N-O.

He can hear pool balls clacking in the background, the quiet chatter of other bar patrons, and the steady beat of lyrics through the speakers as he plays with a napkin at the table, trying and failing to convince himself that Zayn could work for him, at least for a little while.

At some point Zayn starts to sway in front of him and Louis quirks an eyebrow. Zayn flushes beautifully, starting to stand up off his stool and apologizes sweetly, walking away: “Sorry, I have to excuse myself. I just _love_ this song.”

They watch as the raven-haired man makes his way to the open space between the tables and the bar, swaying his hips with his back facing them, dancing by himself and not even feeling sorry for it. Louis can see how Liam’s eyes track the movement, and he flickers his own gaze over to Harry to find the man already staring back at him, jaw set and teeth crunching a peanut from the basket on the table in his teeth irritably. _Okay then._

Liam keeps his eyes on Zayn, comments, “Lad, I’m sorry, but any guy who moves his hips like that…” he exhales sharply, like he’s in awe, “you have to wonder…” he finishes.

Louis snaps his eyes away from Zayn and to the table. “ _Hey_ , man,” he says sharply, eyes flicking to Harry meaningfully and back to Liam with a pointed glare.

Liam just shakes his head like he _didn’t_ just say something sexual about another man with his fucking boyfriend sitting right there, looking over to Harry who is still glaring at Louis; who doesn’t even look like he heard Liam and instead looks pissed and… _jealous?_ “Oh, no, he’s cool. Harry, you’re cool right?”

Harry turns his gaze to Liam and his eyes widen, jaw clenching and unclenching. “Yeah,” he nods. “Of course. I’m cool,” he adds offhandedly and he’s glaring at Louis like a challenge. “…But I don’t think Louis’s interested in him,” he finishes, smirking, tilting his head.

Louis’s heartbeat picks up when he hears Harry. “He’s not?” Liam questions unbelievingly while Louis turns back around on his stool, tearing his eyes away from Zayn and meeting Harry’s incredulously. “ _I’m not?”_ He asks tersely.

“I don’t think you are…” Harry shakes his head nonchalantly. “Are you?” His head tilts just that much when he asks, feigning innocence, and it makes Louis’s blood boil. He glances back over to Zayn before he smirks, standing up off his chair with purpose. Harry watches him go, following his movements, and the challenging smirk slips off his face easily, eyes darkening as Louis goes.

Louis beckons Zayn over when he reaches within a couple feet of the man and Zayn comes easily, peeling off the leather jacket he's been wearing all night and throwing it onto an empty pool table. The song has switched - something more upbeat; good fuck music, Louis’s mind supplies absently - and he lets Zayn sway his hips as he comes closer.

They’re dancing together quickly, Zayn turning around to grind back on Louis, and Louis takes it in stride, peeling off his jacket too and throwing it down by Zayn’s. He watches as Zayn works his body in front of him, sneaking seductive glances over his shoulder and if Louis _was_ into him, his knees would have buckled by now. Too bad he’s not.

Harry is quick to stand up off his stool too, fuming, reaching for Liam’s hand and pulling his boyfriend’s body after him, joining Louis and Zayn. There’s a new kind of fire in Harry’s eyes, a new determination, and it makes Louis want to work harder, makes him want to draw a reaction out of him.

Harry’s body sways the same as Zayn’s and Louis can't help but to let his mind wander as he watches him, even as he dances with another man. He can't help but imagine Harry’s naked body on top of his, his lanky legs trying to bend so that he can situate himself on Louis correctly. Can’t help but imagine Harry riding him into the mattress, curls matted to his forehead and his obscene lips parted as he moans. _Fuck_ Louis wants that. Fucking hell.

-

They’re all laughing (besides Harry, who has been uncharacteristically quiet for the whole ride back) when they pull into the driveway of Louis’s childhood home hours later, and Liam climbs out first, Harry after him. Liam compliments Zayn’s car as soon as they’re standing by it and Zayn laughs flirtatiously, thanking him.

Harry is quiet still, only softly saying that it was nice to meet Zayn (because he’s still so polite, even when he’s pissy), and Louis doesn’t miss the way Liam wiggles his eyebrows when Zayn tells the other couple that he’s gonna take Louis for a drive, draw the night out a little more in his convertible. He doesn’t miss the way Harry’s jaw clenches and his eyes harden that much more, glassy in the moonlight, either.

-

Louis wakes up the next morning well rested, walking out of his makeshift bedroom and into the kitchen. Everyone else is already up, swarming around the table and stuffing their mouths full of food. Every single person is singing praise about the pancakes that Harry had made as Harry cooks another batch at the kitchen island on a portable skillet, and Louis has no problem admitting that the do look delicious. Harry wasn’t lying when he said he could cook.

Niall comes up behind him, reaching for a cup of orange juice and swallowing the contents before asking uncerimoniously, “How’s Captain Lucky doing this morning, huh?”

He finishes it will a pat to the shoulder and Louis tries not to grimace, responding with a noncommittal, flat, “Oh. It was fun.”

“Yeah?” Niall continues, oblivious, “Heard you worked up _quite_ the appetite last night,” he finishes, beaming, before reaching his plate out towards the island and asking for another stack from Harry. If Harry is hitting the pancakes with the spatula a little too hard at the comment, Louis pretends not to notice. He smiles hesitantly instead, says, “Actually, you know what? I am a little hungry.”

Harry grimaces down at him, flips the pancakes one more time and goes to plop a stack down on Louis’s plate before changing his path and giving them to Niall instead. He gives the next two stacks to Daisy and Phoebe too before finally lifting up the last two onto the large spatula, hovering them over Louis's plate. He flips them over and onto the space, smirking at Louis when the smaller man glares at him once he sees the pancakes on his plate.

Two beautiful pancakes, totally burnt and black on the top, and Harry doesn’t even look sorry.

“Asshole,” Harry mutters under his breath before turning away again, only loud enough for Louis to hear.

-

They decide to start up a game of soccer - because American football is just not a sport the Tomlinson-Deakin and Co. clan care to play - and they split into teams: Louis, Ally, Niall, and the older twins, versus Lottie, Harry, Matthew, Liam, and Dan; Jay, Ernie, and Doris watch from the steps.

Louis goes at it hard, happy to be back on a field after not really having a chance to play the sport much since college. He plays a little dirty when it comes to Harry too, just because he can, and every opportunity is used to tackle him. It’s not hard, since Harry seems to be wholly uncoordinated when it comes to _soccer_ of all things, and he goes down easily every time.

He also stands up every time and either glares at Louis or gives him a smug smirk, like he knows exactly what Louis is doing and is nonverbally saying that he’s going to have to try harder to piss Harry off. Once Harry catches on to Louis’s plan however, he’s all over the idea, bumping into Louis as much as possible or just stealing the ball from him and sticking his tongue out after a successful attempt. And every time they stand back up from a fall, Harry helps him up, but only so that he can rest his hands on Louis’s hips or touch him tactfully, something Louis knows he knows is getting Louis worked up. And like, it’s not _his_ fault just Harry’s _fingers_ turn him on.

Right at the end of the game, when the teams are tied five goals to match the other team’s five, Louis is on his way towards the opponent’s goal, dribbling around Liam and Lottie, and he’s just about to score on Dan when he’s tackled, and he goes down with a thump.

Harry lands right on top of him, and the handsome bastard is _smirking_ at Louis. They’re staring right into each other’s eyes and Louis swears it’s one of those really fucking cliché moments when everything else disappears and all he can see is Harry. Harry’s green eyes and the matted curls on his head, the sweat that’s beading between his eyebrows and how flawlessly clear his tan skin is. All he can feel is Harry too, the way Harry’s body is encompassing his completely and totally, how their hips are aligned, and Louis could just buck up against him if he wanted. It’s a thought.

He’s only wearing joggers right now too, which is really not good for the situation they’re in because they’re loose and grey and they don’t hide _anything_. Harry’s eyes flicker to his lips several times and at this point, Louis can’t see the problem if they were just to lean in, press their mouths together so that Louis could finally taste Harry, taste what he’s been craving for days.

Harry looks at him one more time before he climbs off him with a smirk, like he can _feel_ what he’s doing to Louis, and shit, he actually might just be able to. His hand brushes over the fabric that covers Louis’s bulge as he stands and Louis can’t help it when he whines at the contact, intentional or not (but Louis guesses the former). He lets out a tiny, almost incoherent moan before he gets control of himself and stands up, ignoring the self-satisfied smirk on Harry’s lips that he’s really not hiding well, and cooling himself down. He gets his head back in the game and that’s it, the contest carries on.

At least until Louis gets hit in the face with the soccer ball. Harry looks too guilty (not sorry, just guilty) to not be the culprit.

It’s when his mother is wiping the blood of his face a couple minutes later, him lying on a chair on the porch, that she brings up the one thing that he doesn’t want her to bring up. “Why you persist in acting like a fifteen-year-old boy is beyond me,” she chastises, fixing him with one of her _I-mean-business_ looks.

“I didn’t mean to get hurt mom,” Louis defends, “I’m not the one who kicked the ball, just the one that got hit.”

She gives him an unimpressed look. “We both know that’s not what I’m talking about love.”

He’s about to respond to that when his phones goes off, grabbing it out of his pocket as Jay continues to wipe his face and handing it to Dan to answer. “Hello?” his stepfather asks into the phone.

“It’s for you,” he explains, handing the receiver to Louis.

“Hello?” Louis repeats again, listening. It’s a woman’s voice on the line.

The group of his siblings and nephews and nieces quiet when his mom shushes them, and Louis smiles at her before looking out over the crowd of his family gathered at the bottom of the stairs attached to the porch.

“Okay,” he starts, clapping his hands together in suspense. “So I just got off the phone with the head writers of _Sports Illustrated_ , and they want to have a sit down with me about writing in their soccer column. They’re driving up tomorrow,” he explains, grinning.

There’s cheers from all around and Jay announces that they’re going to celebrate the news, calling everyone in for her famous chocolate pie, and Louis smiles, sitting down on the porch steps as everyone pats him on the shoulder and congratulates him before walking into the house.

Lottie sits down beside him when everyone else has disappeared. “Louis?”

Louis laughs, unbelieving and off in his own little world.

  
  
“Lou. _Louis_?”

“Hmm?” Louis hums, turning to her and shaking his head and focusing. Lottie looks serious.

“Doris just asked me why you’re flirting with Harry.”

Louis’s smile falters. “I wasn’t flirting.”

Lottie just shakes her head. “Don’t worry, I covered for you. I told her it was nothing.”

“Because it _was_ ,” Louis stresses, gaping at his sister.

“Louis,” Lottie deadpans, “I’m your younger sister, but that does _not_ mean I’m a child. You were flirting. I’m not here to chastise you about it, just cool it, yeah? I don’t want you to get hurt Lou, and I don’t want Liam to either.”

  
With that she stands up, pressing a kiss to his forehead before walking away, leaving Louis sitting there alone before he can even come up with a reply.

-

They have the annual family-gathering-talent show later that night, and almost everyone participates. Niall plays the guitar, Daisy, Phoebe, and Lottie all do the Cup Song together, Sophie, Sammy, Dottie, and Ernie put on a pretend fight, all dressed in different Marvel and DC costumes, Ally sings a song, and Jay and Dan perform a quick comedy skit. Liam and Louis - because Louis was pulled into helping Liam when he couldn’t remember the lyrics of the song he wanted to sing and got too nervous, so he roped Louis into it too - are last, and everyone’s quiet as they walk up to the front.

“Okay, last but not least… Liam,” Lottie introduces as Louis and Liam walk up to the makeshift stage in the family room, Louis throwing a guitar strap around his neck and sitting next to Liam who stands, starting hesitantly. “Someone very wise - Louis - once told me if you want to be completely honest, sing. So, I’d like to introduce my band,” Liam gestures to Louis alone and the crowd laughs softly, “And together we’re going to play a song.”

Louis starts to strum at the guitar as Liam warms up his voice, gets rid of the nerves and Harry watches on, listens as Jay speaks beside him, saying offhandedly, “ _I don’t believe it. Louis hasn’t played since Miles…_ ”

She trails off but Harry’s interest is still there, thoughts flying through his mind and watching with intent as Louis counts Liam in, opening his mouth to sing.

_Maybe it's intuition  
Somethings you just don't question  
Like in your eyes, I see my future in an instant  
And there it goes, I think I've found my best friend_

Liam starts softly, his voice wavering, and Louis knows he’s having trouble remembering the lyrics. He says the next line brokenly, words falling short when he can't remember, and he looks back at Louis helplessly. Louis nods with him, reassuring, and sings along to help Liam catch on again.

_I know that it might sound  
More than a little crazy  
But I believe_

_I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life_

Liam falls flat again after the chorus and Louis picks back up, leading Liam for another line.

_There's just no rhyme or reason  
Only a sense of completion  
And in your eyes, I see the missing pieces  
I'm searching for, I think I've found my way home_

Liam stops _again_ and he freezes as Louis strums the guitar, waiting for the words to come to Liam and failing. He panics slightly and the next thing he knows he’s the one singing, Liam’s voice coming in every couple of lines for a word or two that he manages to remember.

_I know that it might sound  
More than a little crazy  
But I believe_

_I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life_

Liam joins in again and he sends Louis a grateful smile, but Louis doesn’t see it because he’s too busy staring at Harry, Harry’s green irises staring right back as the words pour out of Louis’s mouth and he just can't stop them.

 _  
_ _I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life_

Louis continues through the last few verses and Liam joins back in at the final chorus (which seems to be the only thing he actually memorized), but Harry isn’t even paying attention to him anymore, too caught up watching Louis, swallowing around the lump in his throat. Louis sets the guitar down as soon as it’s over and he glances at Harry one more time, sees the way his eyes are gleaming. It’s dead silent in the room, everyone sitting in shock and awe at Louis, before he’s running out of the room without another thought, ignoring the applause that sounds behind him.

-

Louis’s sitting on his bed, head in his hands, when the door clicks. He looks up to see Harry slipping in, closing the door behind him with a pained look on his face.

“What the hell was that?” He asks and his voice _breaks_ , Louis’s heart breaking with it.

“I - I don’t know… _I’m sorry_ ,” he admits stupidly.

“What am I supposed to do now?” Harry questions, taking a step further. His eyes search Louis’s like all he needs is Louis to tell him and everything will be okay. It won’t be though, Louis has enough experience to know.

  
  
Louis shakes his head, squeezing his eyes shut and willing away the way he can feel them burn with unshed tears. “You can't do anything. He’s my best friend Harry.”

Harry looks slightly angry now, if not hurt. “Why did you sing for _me_ , then?”

“Because I-I’m… I _can't_ …” Louis trails off, shaking his head and pursing his lips, wishing he could say everything that he knows he shouldn’t.

Harry continues, resolute, begging Louis with his eyes, pleading. He’s holding a book in his hand, one that has the words LOUIS TOMLINSON scrawled into the spot where the author’s name goes.

“Page 36: ‘ _Did I just die because an angel walked into the room_.’ Page 71: “ _I’ll forgive you your past if you’ll forgive me mine._ ’ Fucking _hell_ , all his best lines were _yours_ , Louis.” The words are bitter coming out of Harry’s mouth now and they’re sharp. He shakes his head, continuing, “Everything he said to me, everything that made me want to stay and _try_ , they all came from you. It’s all written in your damn _book_ , for fuck’s sake Louis.” Louis flinches when Harry raises his voice and it hurts, it physically hurts to know that this is Louis’s fault, that he hurt Harry like this.

He can't say anything though; he’s already gone too far, crossed the line. It’s a fine line between what they’ve been doing and what they shouldn’t, and Louis can’t hurt Liam like that. He can't be the one who completely destroys that barrier. Not anymore than he already has.

When Louis doesn’t speak, tries only to convey what he means through his eyes, Harry backs up, sniffling to hold the tears Louis can see pooling in his eyes in and shaking his head. “It’s insufferable, I- Louis I can't. I can't do it anymore. I can't keep pretending with him, not when I know _you_.” He reaches for the door handle blindly, wiping at his eyes and Louis reaches out to keep him, make him stay, but Harry’s already gone.

-

Louis wakes up to the sun shining through the window, beaming into his eyes, and shouting from outside. He walks into the kitchen just to see all his siblings - all his family, really - pressed up close to the windows that overlook the long driveway. “Hey, what’s going on?”

Phoebe shushes him before turning back to look at whatever has managed to catch everyone else’s attention, and he saunters over, looking out the window to try to figure out what has everyone so quiet. The Tomlinson-Deakins are never quiet.

Louis wishes he hadn't seen though; wishes he would’ve stayed in bed and just ignored it. Liam is standing at the door to Harry’s car, holding it open just barely as the curly-headed man apologizes time and time again. He’s shaking his head, looking up at Liam and doing his best to explain while simultaneously trying to close the door, just trying to get Liam to let him go.

He gets the door shut eventually when Liam gives in, and he looks back up at Liam one more time before speeding away as soon as his ex-boyfriend has stepped away from the vehicle. Louis watches on as Harry leaves, one of his best mates screaming after him, kicking a pile of leaves.

Liam turns and storms into the house once Harry’s car has disappeared and Louis is quick to make himself busy, pretending to ignore when Niall asked Liam what happened, blocking it out when Liam responds with, “Said I was a great guy. Said he loved me a lot. And then he said we should go find our true soulmates. Said he’s fallen for someone else.”

Louis keeps his eyes on the floor when he walks out of the kitchen as Liam watches him go.

-

Louis gets the call when they’re all sat in the living room, playing a game of charades and yelling out names rapid fire. He clicks the ‘answer’ button and presses it to his ear. The voice comes deep and worn through the receiver, but it’s familiar immediately.

“I’m sorry,” the voice says, and he sounds pained. Louis’s heart breaks through the phone.

“I know,” Louis responds softly, not sure how else to answer.  
  
“I didn’t get far,” it says again, wistfully, hopefully, and Louis is out of his seat already, sneaking away while Daisy acts out SpongeBob.

“I’m on my way love.”

-

It’s raining when Louis slips out of his own car, sliding into the passenger seat of Harry’s desperately. Harry laughs happily when he sees him and the smile on his face can't be described as anything other than fond. “What are we doing?” he questions, but his grin only brightens.

“I don’t know love,” Louis shakes his head; he’s smiling too. “I don’t know.”

Harry smiles softly at him before his eyebrows furrow. “How are we going to do this? I mean, how do we explain it? What do I tell your family, I--” he cuts himself off when Louis gives him a serious look.

“What?” Harry askes confusedly.

“I think this is all premature,” he admits, biting his lip.

Time freezes for a second before Harry’s smile falters and his eyebrows furrow even more. “Oh,” he says, and it’s stunted. “I, uh, yeah of course. Erm, I’m sorry, I just-- okay. Gosh, I’m so stupid, I can't believe--”

Louis cuts off his rambling with a building grin, adds, “We don’t even know if you can _bowl_.” Harry closes his mouth, and a look of realization crosses his face. He smirks back and the smile fights its way back onto his face.

-

Harry can't. He’s fucking awful and he has no hand-eye coordination whatsoever, but Louis is hopelessly endeared anyway. They laugh and they bowl and when the older lady working the cash register sees them, she turns the lights down so that only disco balls that hang from the ceiling are illuminating the room in neon colors and the lanes glow with flashing lights. Music plays through the speakers and Louis smiles at Harry when they realize what the lady is doing.

They’re the only ones in the whole building save for the woman, and they laugh and they flirt like nothing else, and they challenge each other on who can get to thirty points first (yes, _thirty_ , they’re _awful_ ). They take turns coming up with new ways to throw the bowling ball down the lane and it’s everything for them. It’s everything when Harry completely misses their lane and his ball goes straight into the gutter; it’s everything when Louis laughs at the huge dork in front of him and it’s everything when Harry stumbles (because he’s a right mess on his own two legs), lands in Louis’s arms.

It’s everything when they stare into each other’s eyes and Harry unconsciously licks his lips; when they hesitantly lean in, just brushing their mouths over each other’s at first; when Harry licks into Louis’s mouth and Louis just lets him. It’s everything and Louis never wants to pull away, wants to hear the content, satisfied moans and whimpers coming from Harry’s mouth for the rest of his life.

“ _Louis_?! _Oh my gosh_.”

Louis and Harry pull back from each other like they’ve been burned, and they look to the seats to find everyone - _Louis’s whole fucking family_ \- standing in front of them, setting down their things and freezing when their brains register what’s happening in front of them.

_Fuck_.

Louis takes a step back, watches as everybody’s eyes fall on him and Harry and he runs his hands through his hair, frustrated. This can’t possibly get any worse.

“ _What the hell_? … _Harry_?”

  
It got worse.

Louis looks up to see Liam walking in, confusion settling over his face. “They were just kissing,” Ernie points out helpfully from the rest of the crowd.

The chatter starts up as soon as everyone has gotten over the initial shock and Louis spares Harry a glance - he looks scared, terrified - before he looks back to everyone else. “I can explain,” he starts, looks towards Liam. “You two broke up right?” It’s not his strongest point but it’s too late to start with something else.

Liam looks… Louis doesn’t know how he looks. He doesn’t know how to explain it. “Two hours ago, we broke up _two hours_ ago,” Liam says, “What the hell Louis?”

Louis shakes his head, gesturing out in front of his as he fishes for words. “I can explain, I can explain.”

“Yeah, let him explain,” Liam decides sharply.

Louis stutters. “I - uh, okay. Remember the guy from the bookstore?” He gestures to Harry standing next to him, the man refusing to make eye contact with anyone, “Here he is. …You told me to go after him, Li, and I didn’t. I didn’t because it’s _you_. But. I know how this looks, I do, and I know how it feels, Liam. I--”

He’s cut off by a fist colliding with his cheek, Liam lunging at him and exclaiming, “How does this _feel_ you fucking bitch??”

Louis’s steps falter with the weight of the punch and he stumbles but he doesn’t go down. Harry makes a noise of surprise mixed with anguish next to him, looking on with wide eyes and pooling tears.

Liam is pulled back as soon as he makes contact with Louis’s face and Niall is helping him up while Harry freaks out, apologizing to any and everybody while he backs up, barely keeping the tears in. He apologizes another time and then excuses himself and Louis is quick to pull away from Niall examining his cheek.

He sprints after the curly-headed man, holding his cheek and bursting through the doors. Harry is already at his car, climbing in, and Louis rushes over, tears pooling in his own eyes as he pulls on the door handle, begs Harry not to go. “I’m sorry,” Harry apologizes for the hundredth time, pulling the door shut as his voice breaks, “I don’t know what we were thinking.”

He starts the car with tears running down his cheeks and pulls away as soon as the engine turns over and Louis can only watch him go, crying himself and shouting after the disappearing vehicle with everything he has, dropping to his knees and sobbing and cursing when he can't see it anymore.

-

Louis walks into his house an hour later to see everyone sitting in the living room, huddled into chairs as hot cocoa is passed around, and Jay comes up to him with a warm cloth as soon as he enters, wiping away the dried blood.

He turns back to see two strangers sitting amongst the rest of his family and _shit_ , _Sports Illustrated_ was coming today. He sits down immediately, crowding into the only open chair, opposite everyone else, and shakes hands with the man and the woman. They introduce themselves, praising that they already have talked to the other two candidates in the running for the position of their soccer column, but that they’re confident that they saved the best for last, and Louis has to ignore the glare he gets from Liam when the man enters the room, grabbing a stool and sitting a few feet away from him, a pack of frozen peas on his knuckles.

Louis turns back to the interviewers, glancing at the rest of his family cautiously, and he smiles back at the man and the woman, telling them he’s ready to start and wincing when the woman stares at the forming bruise on his face.

-

The interview goes like shit. Not only does he look like he just got hit by a gorilla with the bruise he’s sporting under his left eye and the blood dried on his nose, his mind’s not in it and he can't give straight answers. Both interviewers look concerned by his lack of - blatantly - _trying_ , with his responses, and they are completely underwhelmed by him as a whole, he knows.

When he waves them goodbye an hour later, he can only hope that the other two candidates got hit by a truck or something before their interviews, or he’s utterly fucked and there’s no way he’s getting the position, a position he’d been working for ever since he graduated college.

He slips away as soon as their gone, not even close to ready for the hounding that’s inevitable from every single person in the house of twenty, and locks himself in his “room”, doing his very best to not think of Harry driving away and sleeping instead. He fails in every aspect.

-

When he wakes up a few hours later, he sighs and sits up, rubbing his face, and drearily walking into the kitchen, where only Jay and Dan occupy. He rests his hip on the door jamb as he watches them wash and dry dishes. “I really fucked up,” he admits when he's been standing there long enough without straightforward acknowledgment.

Jay gives him a sympathetic look before going back to her cleaning. “No, you didn’t love.”

Louis shakes his head, crossing his arms over his chest while he leans in the threshold. “Yes, I did mom. What I did to Liam, the interviewers. I really, _really_ fucked up.”

Jay sighs. “Admittedly, not your best day sweetheart.”

Louis walks further into the room, sitting down on a stool at the island where Jay and Dan are working, and snorts. “That’s the understatement of the century. If I had-- If I had just stayed focused, worked on getting the job instead…”

Jay tsks, setting down the mug she was drying. “Love is messy baby, you know that.”

Louis shakes his head. “I should know better; I _do_ know better. I hurt Li and he’s one of my best _friends_ , mom.”

Jay smiles softly at him. “Then go un-hurt him Lou. Honey, you’ve made a lot of mistakes--”

“Many, many mistakes,” Dan chimes in playfully and Jay smacks him with a rag, smiling amusedly.

“-- _but falling for Harry wasn’t one of them_.”

Louis’s head snaps up to her. His mind races and he’s about to ask her to repeat that but the look on her face tells him everything. He thinks belatedly that maybe it shouldn’t be so obvious, that his mom shouldn’t be able to tell so easily, but he knows the thought isn't worth the time of entertaining it. He knows that, even if he doesn’t want to admit it, the way he feels about Harry in three days rivals how he felt about Miles in months, and that. That means something; that means a lot actually.

-

He walks into the living room to see Liam sliding on his jacket. “Li,” Louis starts hastily, walking over to the man.

Liam just shakes his head, scoffing. “If it was anyone else, Louis, _anyone_. …Why couldn’t it be someone else?”

Louis swallows thickly. “I’m sorry,” he croaks out, looking up at Liam earnestly. “I’m _so_ sorry. I didn’t mean to… I didn’t mean to fall for him Li, you have to know that.”

Liam nods, adjusting his jacket, sighing in defeat. “I know Lou, I _know_ you didn’t, which is admittedly worse, because there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it. I know you’re sorry and we’ll be okay, just not right now. I love you; it just hurts a lot.”

Louis nods, understanding, and he’s about to say something else when he’s interrupted by a car honk. Liam gives him a small, only slightly forced smile and starts walking away. “That’s my ride.”

Louis turns confusedly, watching at Liam makes his way out of the door and down the porch, walking towards a red car sitting in the front driveway and-- _is that?_ Well, Louis’ll be damned. 

Louis watches as Liam climbs into the passenger seat of the convertible, leaning over and pecking the driver softly before leaning back in his own seat and buckling in. They both look Louis’s way and wave, and Louis can’t help but to smile as the car drives away.

He has to admit, Liam and Zayn look good together. The thought makes him smile brighter. Him and Liam will be okay. 

-

He walks back into the living room to see Lottie, Phoebe, and Daisy all sitting on the couch, talking quietly and they go silent when he walks in. He gives a small, cautious smile as he walks closer. “Can I talk to you guys?”

They don’t look happy about it, but they nod, sitting back in the couch and waiting. He pulls a stool over, setting it in front of them and just looking at his sisters for a moment before he opens his mouth. “I know I messed up,” he starts, “Big time.”

“Yes, you did.

“Yep.”

“We know.” They three of them respond, all dead pan.

Louis huffs. He knows he taught them not to take shit from anybody, but this is really not what he meant. He takes a deep breath, steadying himself before he continues. “I know you guys are protective of Li, just like you are of me, but me and Li are going to me fine, can you guys understand that?”

They nod slowly.

Louis sighs and starts carefully. “I missed Miles, guys. I missed Miles for a really long time, and you all know what he meant to me. But Harry… I think he might mean more than that, if I’m honest.”

The girls all look at him with curious expressions, waiting for him to continue. Louis takes another breath. “Miles was an important person in my life for a long time, but I’ve come to terms with it. I’ve accepted it. I know you all think I haven’t and that I just threw myself into my work - and I did, at first - but I have. He’s important to me, always will be, but Harry. Harry’s _different_ , you guys. I can't explain it because I don’t know how, and it’s only been…” He trails off.

“Three days,” Phoebe speaks up.

Louis laughs coarsely. “Yeah _, three days_. I mean, how can you know in just three days? I--” Louis’s eyes widen and he cuts himself off. Holy _shit_.

“Holy shit. _I know_.”

He laughs in disbelief. He’s an idiot.

“ _Fuck_ , you guys, I’m in love with him. It’s been three days and I love him. _I’m head over arse in love with Harry Styles_.” He sits there, mouth open in shock, and just watches the faces in front of him as they watch him, bows his head and plays with his thumbs, holding down a sad smile when no one else reacts to his little epiphany.

“Then go get him you idiot,” Lottie speaks up from the end.

Louis’s eyes snap up to hers.

“Yeah, what are you waiting for Lou?” Daisy chimes in. “We love him, we thought you knew that. Sure, it’s a little _problematic_ how it happened, but he makes you happy. You said Liam understands, and you haven’t smiled like you smiled this weekend in years. You deserve him Lou.” She finishes there and doesn’t say anything else, but Phoebe nods in agreement from beside her, like it’s just that easy, and Louis’s eyes light up.

_When in the world did they grow into bigger adults than him?_

-

He finds him in at the gym - go figure - the next day (Daisy helped him stalk his Instagram and figure out which Gold’s Gym he had a membership for), after he drove all the way to New York to find him. He’s running on the treadmills, sweat beading on his forehead, curls matted and muscles flexing in his black tank top and basketball shorts. He looks absolutely gorgeous, and Louis smiles at the picture alone.

Harry’s eyes catch his and he looks utterly shocked, a giant grin spreading over his face. Louis smiles back, shrugging and watching as Harry goes to get off the treadmill, smiling as he does. Of course, being as clumsy as he is, he trips, losing hold on the sides and he goes down.

“ _Shit_ ,” Louis curses under his breath.

He runs straight to the entrance of the gym, bypassing going to the front desk and instead heading straight for Harry. There’s a man helping him up, squatting by his side and Harry looks bashful, cheeks flushed as he shyly thanks the man.

Louis laughs as he walks up to Harry, the good Samaritan leaving back to his own workout when Harry assures him that he’s fine, and Harry flushes a little more when he remembers that Louis just saw that too, but his grin is still bright. “What are you doing here?” the curly-headed man asks.

Louis smiles softly, tilting his head and just taking in the man in front of him.

He’s everything Louis’s every wanted, Louis can admit now without it scaring him. Everything he knew and didn’t know he needed. He makes Louis’s heart beat faster just at the thought of the man and his laugh is heavenly. He makes stupid jokes that only endear Louis more and he cares _so much_ about everything. He sees the good in people even when they don’t see it in themselves and he’s not perfect, but he’s perfect for Louis. Everything about him is perfect for Louis, and Louis is so fucking in love with him.

“I’m so fucking in love with you,” Louis admits, smiling in awe of the beautiful creature in front of him.

Harry’s smile grows tenfold, something Louis didn’t even know was possible, and his dimple is a crater on his gorgeous face with how hard he’s smiling. He steps closer to Louis, takes his face in his hands without a thought and says back, “I’m so fucking in love with you too, Louis Tomlinson.”

Louis beams at Harry and he doesn’t even have to wait for what he wants to do next, because Harry is leaning in and kissing him before he can make the move himself. Louis involuntarily moans at the feeling and Harry’s lips are soft and sweet on his, everything Louis remembers. He smells like sweat and gym and Louis has half a mind to be disgusted, but he just can't be. It’s everything he’s ever wanted, and he loves all of it. He’s going to love all of it for the rest of his life.

**_Finished._ **

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, it means a lot!! I hope you've enjoyed it, feel free to leave a comment !, much love <3


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